Creating Community
“When I is replaced with WE even illness becomes wellness.”
I recently came across this quote from Malcolm X and it really resonated with me.
🌻 I have always felt healthier, more grounded, loved, and emotionally resilient when receiving support from others.
🌻 Whether it be family, friends, colleagues, or my own coach, it’s important to ask for support and be open to receiving it.
🌻 The more I surround myself with likeminded people or people who love me for me, the more I thrive.
The minute I do things alone and try to superwoman my way through, is when I get sick. When my body gets tired and I have GI issues, when my emotions are mostly fear, anxiety, and stress. I also see this in my clients when we have 1:1 coaching sessions, or in the virtual workshops I run.
These last 5 days have been stressful, and I have slipped back into old ways of dealing with stress.
Even though we were getting ready for something tremendously fun, there was an added layer of stress because we never did it with the kids before.
And - in the end - my stress was a gift for me to see where I needed to heal and grow on a deeper level.
Here is what the last 5 days looked like …
Saturday - We decided that we’d all be going to Brazil to visit my husband’s family (yup, all 4 of us!).
Sunday - We filled out the kids’ passport application and compiled all the backups with copies.
Monday - We got their passport pictures taken.
Tuesday - We went to our local post office to submit their applications (expedited!).
Wednesday - We applied for a new travel credit card (proud owner of an AmEx gold), got Delta SkyMiles for everyone, and booked our flights.
We’re so excited AND my superwoman felt like it was her time to shine!
Those old superhuman habits snuck in really fast and did not let up. They have helped me in the past but now they are just brought on a lot of dis-ease and added angst to my mental health.
Pushing through … just need to get it done before I can rest
Not eating well … STUFFING MY EMOTIONS WITH FOOD
Doom scrolling through social media … STUFFING AGAIN
Not sleeping well … insomnia from so many screens and stress
Not communicating well … forgetting to ask for help (but my loving husband stayed with me the whole time)
Scared/paralyzed of how we’re supposed to get everything done … a little perfection snuck in here too
And you may be wondering why the need to get this all done by today (Wednesday). Well my husband is now in NYC being his awesome self for the next few weeks and it’s way easier to submit kids’ passport applications with both parents present.
We’re already on a time crunch and yet I was acting like it has to be done yesterday. Did I need to go into overdrive? Nope, not at all.
Keep reading for what came next.
It took me until the 3rd day to really get a grasp as to what was happening.
Then I hit PAUSE.
I have been working on healing these old limiting beliefs that life is meant to be stressful and we need to push through and get it all done before we can rest/play.
AND I still fell back into those patterns because I have never flown internationally with two children before.
I WAS TRIGGERED.
AND the only way I knew how to cope was to let my superwoman drive the bust.
Then - SUPRISE - I got rundown.
AND my body took over. I was ignoring its messages until day when I had no choice but to lay down, take a bath, pray, do a meditation, and focus on caring for myself, PLUS a lot of self-soothing and nurturing talk.
In order to do this, I had to ask for help from my husband and my parents so I could lay low for an early evening.
Then all the shame and judgement for myself came flooding in.
Here I am, a coach who helps other people with these exact stressors and I slipped back into not using my tools.
And, it’s okay because I’m human too, and how could I help others if I didn’t experience these things myself.
CUE more self-soothing and nurturing talk with daily meditations and carving out time for myself.
If this sounds like you, you’re not alone. We all have these old patterns that we fall into and it’s okay. We’re human and we need to give ourselves and others the space to be, and have grace and compassion for ourselves and others.
This is why I’m offering more free workshops and opening up my calendar to invite more of you to work with me 1:1.
I want to grow this community where:
🌻 YOU feel seen and heard,
🌻 YOUR emotions are validated, and
🌻 YOUR ideas are celebrated!!!
The next free workshop will be on
Saturday, June 22nd @ 9:30am EST
🌝 Join me for 90 minutes and be open to learning something new. Be open to feeling fully supported.
Be open to experiencing the “or better!”
