A Soft Focus in 2024
“Soft Focus = putting yourself first in a kind and loving manner”
2024 started with a reminder to do less, protect your peace, and put your health first.
Starting on December 31, we were met with a nasty virus that brings upset tummies, headaches, and fevers with it. First my son, then my husband, and now my daughter. I’m the last holdout and I write this while nap trapped, rocking in a cozy chair with calming music playing through our sound bar in our living room.
What does this have to do with soft focus?
Let me back up a little …
Last week, before the new year, I had a class with my mentor. It started the close of 2023 for me as I blessed and released what no longer serves me. During class, one of my colleagues mentioned a softness that they invited into their lives last year. Something they wanted to bring with them into 2024. It got my thinking … softness means being gentle with yourself and others, loving self-talk, and releasing judgement of yourself of others. Well, let me tell you, I did not have much softness in my life throughout 2023.
Fast forward to today and I am being presented with an opportunity to do just this; soften, talk to myself in loving ways, and be my biggest cheerleader. Yup! That’s right! I cheer myself on every day while talking to myself in the mirror. I celebrate the smallest things too.
For example: “You rock!! You did some dishes and the kitchen is clean! You’re a mom, yup you are! And you’re a comfort for your kids, so cool! You’re exactly where you’re meant to be in this moment. Love you ♥️”
I have been catching my negative self talk and shifting it to a more loving and compassionate vibe. I’m not trying to wipe out that it’s hard or to swing too much towards toxic positivity, I’m zooming out and getting perspective.
My goal, every day, is to be fully in the moment and have a soft focus.
So what does it feel like?
It feels like love. It feels like acceptance. And it feels really damn good.
It’s not eliminating any struggles that arise or the massive load of laundry that seems to never go down. It’s shifting my perspective and healing the parts of me that get triggered and go into survival mode.
It’s a balance and one that continues to shift because I’m human and meant to grow.
It also looks like me taking more selfies. I know what you’re thinking, oh no not more selfies! Just hear me out. I want to always be my biggest cheerleader. I am choosing to be my biggest cheerleader. I am choosing to accept myself, love myself, and have the most compassion for myself ALWAYS. No matter what I feel like each day or how I think I look, I am with myself more than anyone else. Just like you are with yourself more than anyone else. So, I ask you, why not love on yourself more?
Do I fall back on old habits?
Sure do! However, it’s how I recover that is helping me heal, grow, and get more balance in my life.
I still catch myself focusing on the past, anticipating the future, or getting stuck in what feels like the biggest rut ever!
The difference NOW is that I’m gentle with myself. I recognize it, I accept it, and then I shift my mindset to the present with a lot of love and compassion.*
*As I write this, I realize it sounds like checking off boxes in a list. I have been doing my own connection practice for 12 years now and have been helping others do this since before the pandemic (funny how that has become a marker of time). The steps I take (awareness, acceptance, compassion, shifting) are ones I teach and mentor others on. It’s something I get help with too when I’m feeling like I need more support. So, if you’re needing that extra support. I’m here for you. Click here to see how we can start working together.
Now, I’m looking at the struggles of life as opportunities to grow. Honestly, most times they just feel like struggles, and I need to rely on the work I’ve been doing to shift into mindfulness, being present, and turn a soft focus to me. My family getting sick changed our New Year’s Eve plans. I had to reschedule a session with a client. I cancelled my last free class of a 3-part miniseries. I put a soft focus on me so that I could show up and care for my family.
Here’s a reminder as to how I’m defining soft focus.
Soft focus means putting yourself first in a kind and loving manner.
Softness means being gentle with yourself and others, loving self-talk, and releasing judgement of yourself of others.
Focus means that I put myself first. I still care for my loved ones and show up for them but my priority is me, otherwise I can’t do anything for anyone else.
If you want to learn more about protecting your peace and inviting a softer focus into your life, let’s connect! I’d love to hear from you.
Much love ♥️ LJ
